Agree or Disagree…Everyone Deserves to Have Non-Judgmental Support
I’m sure you’ve seen the plethora of debates scrolling through your news feed. So many of them, after the past two weeks, are close to home for many American women who are of child-bearing age. Rights to health care, contraceptives, pro-life, pro-choice…it can be dizzying. I’ve seen amazing, strong, smart women who feel passionately on both sides of arguments come to a stand off over their keyboards. I’m sure a lot of my own acquaintances and friends have unfollowed, or even unfriended close neighbors, coworkers and family members.
While I don’t fully subscribe to taking political standpoints, as a birth worker and business owner, it is impossible to completely neutralize myself from a few factors, especially as they weigh closely into decision making my clients must face during a delicate time of their lives: pregnancy.
A grand majority of Maryland State Doulas’ clients contract with us for labor and postpartum support. The guidance and reassurance they receive from us is needed and wanted in a time when they need most of all to be lifted up instead of having all of their choices and needs scrutinized. This support remains the same, no matter how they entered their pregnancy. No matter how wanted the pregnancy was, or how the baby was conceived.
I have equally support women who conceived their baby through natural family planning and those who became pregnant after using oral contraceptives for the earlier stage of their relationship until they felt ready for a child. I’ve helped readjust families’ expectations after, sometimes admittedly, an unwelcome pregnancy or surprise, to fully envelop them in their journey towards parenthood.
The support looks the same in one aspect: it’s unconditional and non-judgemental.
That being said, while there are a few instances that are highly contested and debated of late, I wish it to be known the situations that also fall under our unconditional support for mothers and partners:
We provide support to women and families choosing to terminate, or abort, a pregnancy.
We provide support to women and families who choose to keep an unwanted pregnancy conceived through violence and/or rape.
No matter the personal standpoint of myself or my team, we believe strongly that every single pregnancy and its journey, towards completion, or the difficult decision of termination, deserves a hand to hold, a shoulder to cry on, steady gazes to lock on when all around the situation looks bleak and expected support from others wanes.
Truly being there for a human in their time of need, when the decision is great, when the choice is difficult, or easy, is providing that support and guidance. It is only available when one can commit to the ability to remove personal judgement, bias, or opinion. I believe very strongly in our capability as a business to provide that to families.
I also believe that support is a basic human right, one that is an essential component and need of our fabric, and one that only comes from compassion and love for each other.
In a time when so many are struggling with what they believe and what they see around them, we hope to provide a place of comfort and aide to those who need to utilize our services. We will do so proudly and capably.