It's Their Birth Too! Improving Partners' Labor Experience
So much of the time in labor preparation is devoted to what is going on with the laboring Mother - and for good reason! The big event is happening in her body and most of the sensations and different stages require a great amount of emotional and physical readiness on her part.
What is often overlooked is the experience her partner is having. It’s their birth too; they’ve wished on, experienced and watched a little person grow inside their loved one for 40-ish weeks and now are on the brink of meeting their baby. It’s an emotional time and, in labor, also a physically exhausting time for partners too! How can you make sure your birth is equally as supported for your partner?
Don’t exclude your partner from what to expect during your birth. Knowing the ins and outs of labor is important to helping your partner cope with what twists and turns may happen in the birth environment, and how to support you during that time with give your partner confidence in their ability to help ease discomfort.
Discuss What’s Important to Each of You - Ahead of Time
While not every part of birth requires a lengthy discussion, there may be some things and issues that are important to both you and your partner. Make sure in talking through your birth planning you include your partner’s wishes. If they aren’t excited to cut the cord, but would rather stay up near you during birth, honor those wishes. It will greatly increase their enjoyment and fond memories of the birth of your child.
Let Them Eat! (Maybe Not Cake)
Partners need rest. They also need food! Sometimes labor’s timeline bypasses several meals, and while you’re working hard and might not feel like eating, your partner needs calories in their body to support you and stay functioning. If you’d rather they step out to the cafeteria or another room in the home, make sure you have another support team member by your side to allow them to get the refreshment they need (a doula is great for this!).
Have Support Available For Them
A labor doula can greatly increase the enjoyment of the birth experience not only for you, but for your partner as well. Having a doula present can help them relax when things become intense, can remind them that your progress is normal, and allow them to fall back on someone for suggestions when needed. It also provides them peace of mind when they need to take a break, knowing you’re getting great support while they’re out of the room.
Prepare for your birth knowing that it's an experience that can be cherished for years to come in both your and your partners' minds - and that support is available for you both!
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